Master the Art of Napping Etiquette in Public Places
Introduction
So, you've decided to brave the wild frontier of public napping. An audacious move, if I say so myself. But fear not, young Padawan. Much like wine tasting, interpretive dance, and the choice of socks for sandals, there's an unwritten napping etiquette to uphold. To keep you from committing nap faux pas (and becoming a viral sensation for all the wrong reasons), here's a handy guide to the do's and don'ts of catching z's in public.
The Do's
1. Do Carry a Discreet Alarm
Let's start simple. Oversleeping and missing your bus stop is one thing, but drooling on a stranger's shoulder for an extra half hour? Priceless. No, wait. Mortifying. That's the word.
2. Do Choose a Quiet Spot
Now, this might seem like a no-brainer, but not everyone has mastered the fine art of choosing a silent corner. Avoid sitting next to a group of teens debating the latest TikTok trend – unless you enjoy soundtracks to your dreams.
3. Do Wear Sunglasses Indoors
Yes, it might scream “Hollywood diva”, but it's also a strategic public napping move. Nobody can tell if you're asleep or just deeply contemplating the meaning of life. Plus, it protects your eyes from those fluorescent lights.
The Don'ts
1. Don't Use Strangers as Pillows
Contrary to popular belief, a stranger's shoulder is not public property, even if it looks particularly squishy and inviting. It might seem like a perfectly good pillow substitute, but trust me, it's a napping etiquette violation.
2. Don't Become the Snorechestra
If your snoring can rival a chainsaw, public napping might not be your jam. No one signed up for a live performance of “Ode to the Sinuses.”
3. Don't Forget Your Surroundings
While drifting into dreamland, remember you're in a public place, not your living room. Spontaneous sleep-talking or drooling might not adhere to the social norms we're aiming for here.
Conclusion
The world of public napping is filled with thrills, adventure, and the occasional crick in the neck. But with a pinch of awareness, a dash of discretion, and a sprinkling of humor, you can master the sophisticated napping etiquette worthy of any sleep connoisseur. Just remember: drooling is reserved for babies and your private pillow.